Skip to main content

Ralsina.Me — Roberto Alsina's website

Green Soylent and Pink Goo

The oth­er day I was told by a friend of mine "y­ou let your kid eat Chick­en Nuggets at Mc­Don­ald­s? Do you know what they are made of? Amo­ni­a!" This is old stuff, but re­al­ly, it's nev­er too late to snick­er at peo­ple. Let me show you a pic­ture:

What a chick­en nugget is made of. Maybe.

Sure­ly, it can't be good to eat sus­pi­cious pink thing made of uniden­ti­fi­able chick­en bit­s, right? Sor­ry, I have no bet­ter way to say it, but, that's stupid. What that is, is a way to get ev­ery lit­tle bit of pro­tein out of a dead chick­en. And that is good. Be­cause if we are go­ing to kill a chick­en, the least we can do is eat all of it. And this thing does such a good job even fussy five year olds like eat­ing the uniden­ti­fi­able chick­en bit­s.

This is both eco­log­i­cal­ly sound and eco­nom­i­cal­ly wise, but smart. If na­tive amer­i­cans did this, we would for­ev­er show it as an ex­am­ple of their moral su­pe­ri­or­i­ty back when we had not killed them with chick­en­pox, along with their crafty wood­carv­ing.

So, with that out of the way, let's look at an­oth­er pic­ture:

What Soy­lent Green will be made of.

If I lived in that fu­ture, and was told "Soy­lent Green is made of peo­ple! peo­ple!" ( Should I have used a spoil­er alert for a movie re­leased when I was 2? In 1973?), I would say "cool, that guy al­ways had good taste". In the movie, it's not like some­one is kid­nap­ping guys and feed­ing them to the soy­len­tiz­er. It's a vol­un­tary af­fair. Peo­ple say "I'm old, this life suck­s, make me in­to green food". Then, he's eu­th­a­nized and, lat­er, pro­cessed and eat­en. That's not shock­ing, that is log­i­cal.

If I ev­er die (which I in­tend not to), you are all au­tho­rized to turn me in­to pink goo, dye me green, and turn me in­to spe­cial St Patrick­'s day chick­en Mc­Nugget­s.

Bon ap­petit.

lucio / 2012-05-03 23:14:

Es bueno para el pollo saber que no murió en vano y bueno para el bolsillo del fabricante. Sobre la pregunta de si es bueno para el que come comer pollo que tal vez tenga amoniaco o si mejor evitarlo no dijiste nada.

Que haya algo de irracional en el miedo al cambio no quiere decir que los riesgos que asustan no deban ser considerados.

Los cigarrillos son ricos, hasta los adolescentes los quieren, hace mucha plata al fabricante y al estado, y son solo unas hojitas que sacamos de la tierra. Seguramente debe ser buenisimo tambien.

Por otro lado, yo preferiria ser soylent amarillo.

Roberto Alsina / 2012-05-04 00:01:

La diferencia entre la reacción al primer cigarrillo y al primer nugget son notables. Si los nuggets fueran ilegales, Entre Ríos sería Colombia. Pero volviendo al tema, el amoníaco (en realidad hidróxido de amonio) es normalmente cnsiderado inofensivo, y nunca se usó para fabricar nuggets. De hecho, esa pasta rosa sólo se usa para hacer hamburguesas.

Contents © 2000-2023 Roberto Alsina